Once, long ago, when I was all bright eyed and full of optimism, my boyfriend at the time declared Splashy Fen to be his weekend with the boys. Every year, I would pout and plead, and every year he would swan off into the mists of Underberg, returning smelly and dirty, full of tales of the wonderful bands he had seen. It’s a wonder we lasted as long as we did. The point of this is not to explain my current state of abject cynicism and commitment phobia, but rather, why I never got to see the phenomenal Matthew van der Want at any of the many Splashy Fens he played at. And then, when he returned to Durban a few years ago, my friends chose that day to get married. Inconsiderate. While the bride is smaller than me, I weighed up my odds, and realised she could probably take me….so decided against forgoing the reception in favour of the gig. It was a tough call. All this adds up to the fact that last night’s gig was a long time coming for me!
Matthew van der Want released his first album Turn On You in early 1996. With song titles like Jesus Goosestep, I’m pretty sure he realised it wasn’t destined for overnight commercial success. Which might explain why there were only 16 people at the gig last night. And no, this is not me exaggerating in another indictment of Durban’s general apathy. I counted. Yet I think the 16 of us who braved the rain and ignored the international siren call of Katie Melua (who actually cares how many bicycles there are in Beijing, really?!), were some of the luckiest people around last night. I’m not entirely sure Matthew enjoyed the intimacy of the gig (and I really hope he wasn’t getting a door deal!), but it certainly made it a very special experience for the audience. We got to boss him around and tell him when to take breaks, and how many songs to play, for starters.
It’s not easy, being the lone man on the stage, just him, his guitar and his voice – no band to hide behind, no stage antics to provide bravado. You either have it or you don’t. And the fact that during each song, the audience were held in place, like butterflies pinned to a collecting sheet, barely daring to breathe, is testimony to the fact that if anybody has it, Matthew does. He does dark and twisty in a way that makes me feel better about being the cynical bitch I am. His cutting insights into matters of the heart, and satirical take on the music industry have probably made him a few enemies, but anyone with an ounce of self respect or taste should not be able to deny the talent behind the fuck off attitude. He says what he thinks, but he does so with such frightening beauty that you can’t look away. It was a gig that was definitely worth the wait. And as I sat in the plush surrounds of The Zulu Jazz Lounge, watching Matthew bleed poetry underneath an alarming stuffed kudu head, I thought how lucky we are to still have musicians in this country who don’t feel compelled to play it safe to please the masses. His song Turn On You (my favourite) could be as much about what we do to our musicians with our Americanised expectations, as it could be about love:
”I feel so close to you, only a million miles away.
I look for someone else in you.
I find things worth keeping…I throw them all away
I’m on my own when I’m with you,
I turn you on I turn on you
And I don’t know what’s wrong with me,
The sting in my tail is all you feel”
I wish more people had made the effort to go to last night’s gig and experience an exquisite talent – but at the same time, a selfish little part of me is glad those of us who were there had it all to ourselves.
Matthew has a ‘best of’ CD out at the moment, which can be ordered off his website www.vanderwant-letcher.com
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